Emotions & Feelings

 

Let us begin by understanding the difference between Emotions and Feelings. We tend to think that are the same and tend to use them interchangeably.

The difference lies between where the two arise. Emotions originate in the body whereas feelings originate in the mind. Let me explain...

Emotions are bodily functions that are immediate and arise as reactions to a stimulus. The origin is a little organ in our middle brain known as the Amygdala. They are based on the fight, flight or freeze reaction hardwired in us through evolution. They are automatic and cannot be controlled.

                                                                

Feelings on the other hand arise as the end of the process of thinking. It occurs when we let the senses from our sensory organs move to the pre-frontal cortex or the thinking part of our upper brain. This requires a conscious effort of not letting the Amygdala taking control of us, our behaviors and our actions. Feelings are a response more than a reaction. 

So emotions are automatically felt, whereas feelings are consciously thought!

Oh Emotions!!

 

Emotions! What really are they and why are they so up and center in our lives?

The truth is that emotions are an inseparable part of human lives and aren't something you can ignore. But does one really understand what emotions really are? Let's discuss...

If you were asked to list out the emotions that you feel in a regular week, you'll be surprised to find that you may be able to list out a paltry list of very general emotions. And its not just you! Most people would sail in the same boat as you. 

Our experience with emotions has been a pretty long one and we know what these emotions do for you and to you. However, when listing them specifically we often fall short.

The reason that we are unable to identify emotions apart from these general ones is because we are really unable to identify the intensity in which we experience those emotions and identifying what to call them. So we end up listing - happy, sad, angry, afraid, ashamed, and so on...

Being able to identify emotions or being aware of one's emotions is just one part of the entire process of "Being Emotionally Intelligent", and beginning from now, as we end this year, I will try to demystify the concept of Emotional Intelligence and help you understand the importance and significance of it, through this series of articles

I'll leave you with the components of Emotional Intelligence, to think about before we begin the journey - 

So, in a nut shell, Emotional Intelligence is defined as our ability, 

1. To be Self Aware of our Emotions

2. To Manage our Emotions

3. To Understand People

4. To Manage our Relationships

More on the way!!

DreamAura Learning and Coaching Solutions

 

DreamAura Learning and Coaching Solutions

We are a Learning & Development Solutions and Life Coaching Firm.

We aim to enable people to have outrageous dreams and help them to make them true!

The founder of DreamAura is Mr. Siddharth Sathe.

His repertoire ranges from being a Hotelier to a Sailor, from dabbling in Operations, Sales, Quality Assurance & Training in BPOs, to Head Financial Organizations’ Training Teams and now the founder of a Learning and Coaching Solutions Firm.

With over 24 years of Professional experience and 45 years of life, he has learnt a lot from what life teaches. The desire to put these Learnings into transformation of others’ lives is what keeps him going every single moment. His professional expertise lies in Coaching, Training and Motivating, not necessarily in that order.

 But if we were to make a list of his skills sets, here goes -

1. Life Coaching & Motivational sessions –

a. Transformative Coaching

b. Values & Value system

c. Finding Purpose

d. Building Character & Personality

e. Being Proactive

f. Mission Statement

2. Skill Development –

a. Effectiveness Through Habits

b. Sales Management

c. Leadership development

d. Fanatical Customer Service

e. Communication skills

f. Listening Skills

g. E-mail Etiquettes

h. Workplace Etiquettes & Grooming

i. Time & Priority Management

j. Change Management

k. Stress Management

l. Conflict Management

3. Knowledge Development –

a. Emotional Intelligence

b. Financial Markets

c. Securities Markets

d. English Communication & Grammar

This is not an exhaustive list! Just a few examples! The list can go on and keeps lengthening every day as he strives to get better in his knowledge and skills. The Yearning for Learning is always alive!!!

We also channel through YouTube as Dreamaura. The link is as under, for you, to get a peek into what we have to offer –

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu61NMSItwXqX9BPrarPSqQ

To connect with us,

Call/ Whatsapp on 8850478830/9819049852

E-mail on

Siddharth.sathe162704@gmail.com

Dreamauralncsolutions@gmail.com

LinkedIn Bio - 

https://www.linkedin.com/company/dreamaura/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/siddharth-sathe-266aa123/

Detailed List of Programs Conducted

 

A.Behavioural & Leadership Trainings

 

1.       Situational Leadership Workshop

 

Workshop on Leadership Styles & Behaviours. Understanding Development Levels in the Employee Life cycle based on the Skill Will Matrix and the Behaviour Mix suited for impacting each kind of level. Discovering your unique Leadership style and adapting behaviours to suit your set of team members. Group session followed by customized one-on-one session for Leaders to understand their style and behaviour changes required for their teams.

 

Duration: 4 hours session followed by 1 hour session with individual participants

 

2.       SWOT Analysis

 

Session to help participants introspect and understand themselves better. A clearer understanding of Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats make organizations and professionals more effective and result oriented.

 

Duration: 2 hours session followed by 1 hour session with individual participants

 

3.       Effectiveness Workshop

 

“Habits maketh the Man”

 

Workshop based on developing habits that ensure continual improvement in personal and professional life.

 

Duration: 2 Days

 

4.       The Emotionally Intelligent Workplace

 

Emotional Intelligence is defined as our ability,

1. To be Self Aware of our Emotions
2. To Manage our Emotions
3. To Understand People
4. To Manage our Relationships

 

Research in more than 500 organizations showed that EI accounts for more than 85 percent of outstanding performance. EI is a better predictor of top performance than IQ. EI is two times as important to effectiveness as IQ and technical expertise combined.

All these aspects make Emotional Intelligence an extremely important facet in life today. This session is designed to understand and practice Emotional Intelligence with Awareness.

 

Duration: 2 days

B.      Skill based Training

 

1.       Effective Communication skills

2.       Time and Priority Management

3.       Customer Delight – The Pathway to Success

4.       Sales Management

5.       Listening Skills

6.       E-mail Etiquettes

7.       Workplace Etiquettes and Grooming

8.       Change Management

 

C.      Knowledge based Trainings

 

1.       Financial and Securities Market

 

Equities, Derivatives, Commodities Currencies – Concepts, significance & benefits

Mutual Funds and SIPs

Various other Investment Avenues

Sales and Servicing of the above

 

2.       English Language Usage

 

One of the most common concerns for the modern Indian professional is fluency in English communication, verbal or written. It is often considered as a drawback and a cause of low confidence among professionals. This intervention would assist you gain a progressive command over the language to be able to communicate with confidence. The aspects covered would be understanding various parts of speech and their usage, understanding various tenses and their appropriate use and expansion in vocabulary.

 

D. Executive Coaching

 

An exclusive one-on-one Transformative Executive Coaching session based on the scientific coaching principles laid down by the International Coaching Federation (ICF)

The Peak Performer - D4

 

The Peak Performer

Back after a gap. Apologies for it. To reconnect the continuity please ensure you go through these earlier articles to get the most out of this one.

 

Skill Will Matrix

Enthusiastic Beginner

Disillusioned Learner

Reluctant Contributor

 

The Enthusiastic Beginner was an employee at D1 - High Will Low Skill. The ideal confluence of behaviors for an Enthusiastic Beginner is High Directive Low Supportive.

The Disillusioned Learner was an employee at D2 – Low Will Low Skill. The ideal confluence of behaviors is High Directive High Supportive.

The Reluctant Contributor was an employee at D3 - Moderate to High Skill and Inconsistent Will and the ideal confluence of behaviors is Low Directive High Supportive

 

We saw that the way to work with a Reluctant Contributor is to show value in this employee through “Involvement” and “Engagement”. Involve him in the team’s decision making and problem-solving process. Show him the trust you have in his abilities and skills.

 

Give him a few responsibilities to groom the skillsets of some of the D2 employees in your team. This is a perfect example of a WIN-WIN-WIN situation, where you impact the will of both D2 & D3. Ensure that you do not try to impact his skillsets as he is already at a moderate to high level in them and Directive behaviors might a deterrent to both performance and motivation.

If these behaviors are administered in the right manner, this employee is going to smoothly transition into the last development level for that particular role.

And you have the “Peak Performer”

Ideally all your employees should get here without moving into D2 or D3… A smooth transition from D1 to D4. Again when you inherit a team, transition your team members from D2/D3 to D4 if you get any pre-existing ones; however all new members that initiate the role with you, must be transitioned from D1 to D4.

This is an employee who has spent a substantial amount of time in the organization and is close to mastering the skills required for the role. Due to the high skillset, the performance is also consistent and rewards and recognition is flowing. Consequently the motivation/ will levels are also high.

So if you plot this employee on the matrix... this is where he would be.

Let us understand the confluence of Leadership behaviors that he requires.

Since he has almost mastered the skill-sets he does not require instruction on the what, how, where, why, when or constant monitoring. In fact, he would go ballistic internally, if you even attempt to do that. So, Directive behaviors to be on extremely Low burner.

 

Also, since he is on high on the will scale as well he does not need high supportive behaviors as well. This is a self-motivated employee, fueled on by his performance and mastery.

This is an employee set to take on higher responsibilities and possibly… your job!!!

And it is your responsibility to ensure that he does, because by now you should made yourself capable enough to perform your boss’s role. And so, the entire chain of employment in the organization moves up together.

So, this employee needs to be given responsibilities and left alone. He needs to be made aware that as a Leader, you trust his skills and experience to get the results from the responsibilities given to him.

Do not meddle with his methods, however be available if he seeks support. And give him support if he seeks it, not Direction!!! Let him bounce his ideas off you and give him the freedom and authority to make the decisions. Also let him know that the responsibilities of negative outcomes would be yours’.

That is going to get him to try new methods and evolve with freedom.

 

So the ideal confluence of behaviors for a Disillusioned Learner is –

 

Low Directive Low Supportive

 

This is also known as the “Delegating” style of Leadership where your objective is to groom your own Replacement!!

 

With that we wind up with the 4 developmental levels and the corresponding Leadership styles to ensure optimum performance of your teams.

Will be back very soon to understand what happens when we administer the wrong Leadership style to the wrong Developmental Level.

 

Please stay patient till then and re-read the previous articles for revision.

 

CIAO!

The Reluctant Contributor - D3

 

The Reluctant Contributor - D3

Continuing forward in the Skill Will Matrix, we'll move to the "Reluctant Contributor” today.
 
We spoke about the "Enthusiastic Beginner" and “Disillusioned Learner” in the last two articles.
 
The Enthusiastic Beginner was an employee at D1 - High Will Low Skill. The ideal confluence of behaviors for an Enthusiastic Beginner is High Directive Low Supportive.

The Disillusioned Learner was an employee at D2 – Low Will Low Skill and the ideal confluence of behaviors is High Directive High Supportive.
 
We saw that the way to develop a Disillusioned Learner is to continue to provide him with clear instructions on his tasks and roles and Monitoring & Feedback as well as to ensure that you build a strong support system around him. 

Ideally he would need to be transitioned to D4 smoothly without letting him move to D3. If he does move to D3, however, it is not as alarming a transition as letting a D1 slip to a D2.

If specific behavior sets are not administered to him though, he is naturally going to move to D3. (if he does not move on or is not sacked) Let us understand how.
If the employee at D2 spends more time in the organization without any of the above two eventualities happening, he is going to obviously learn more about his roles and tasks. This would lead to his skills to move to moderate to above average levels. Still not high though; because most of his learning has been through trail & error and experimentation.
 
Let me remind you once again, that this is if he has a “manager” without an understanding of the behaviors required.

Due to his above average skill-sets his performance is now going to comparatively improve. But there would be a lot of inconsistency. He would be uncertain as to exactly what he is doing right to be able to extract the right kind of actions and behaviors that lead to favorable results. This is primarily due the lack of proper guidance from his superior.
 
This would result in him still having below average will levels due to the fact that rewards and recognition will come to him; however they’ll be as inconsistent as his performance.
 
So if you plot this employee on the matrix... this is where he would be.

His Skill levels are moderate to high; however his Will levels be inconsistent due to the lack of support that he has received resulting in inconsistent performance.
 
Once again, if the manager is a “Leader” with a firm understanding of “Situational Leadership” the employee would never have reached D3. But this would again be a case of ‘inherited employees’
 
Let us understand the confluence of Leadership behaviors that he requires. Since he is above average in his skills sets he does not require instructions on the what, how, where, why, when or constant monitoring. In fact that is going to tick him off immensely. So Directive behaviors to be on Low!
 
Since his Will levels are inconsistent, however he would need higher supportive behaviors. Now, it is interesting and important to note that the kind of supportive behaviors exhibited with a D3 would be different from those given to a D2.

Here’s when you need to start showing value in this employee through “Involvement” and “Engagement”. Involve him in the team’s decision making and problem solving process. Show him the trust you have in his abilities and skills.

 
Also, going back to the Disillusioned Learner is where the D3 may be able to play a very important role, as I had mentioned in my last post. Since his skill-sets are above average, give him a few responsibilities to groom the skill-sets of some of the D2 employees in your team. This is a perfect example of a WIN-WIN-WIN situation, where you impact the will of both D2 & D3.
 
So the ideal confluence of behaviors for a Disillusioned Learner is –
 

Low Directive High Supportive

 

This is also known as the “Supporting” style of Leadership and should be maintained to improve his skill and will levels to attempt to gradually move him into D4 or Peak Performer.
 
The Danger here is that, while you wouldn’t want to sack these employees, they would definitely be looking for other options of employment. So be careful!
 
The loss to the existing Leader is a potential Leader and his “replacement and path for growth”.
 
That’s it for now. Will "suit up" again for the “Peak Performer” soon.
 
Ciao!!

The Disillusioned Learner - D2

 

D2 -The Disillusioned Learner

Continuing forward in the Skill Will Matrix, we'll move to the "Disillusioned Learner" today.

We spoke about the "Enthusiastic Beginner" in the last article. This was an employee at D1 - High Will Low Skill.

This phase lasts for a couple of months where he stays self-motivated and tries to learn skills he needs to, in order to do his role. However, if the right kinds of Leadership behaviors are not administered to him he is going to be negatively affected.

The ideal confluence of behaviors for an Enthusiastic Beginner is High Directive Low Supportive. But generally leaders tend to err in exhibiting the right kind of behaviors.

The designated managers do not focus too much on this employee and leave him to his own journey, choosing to focus on the performers in the team. 

So if you plot this employee on the matrix... this is where he would be.

His Skill levels are still low; however his Will levels have also deteriorated due to the lack of clarity and direction on the part of the Manager.

If the manager is a “Leader” with a firm understanding of “Situational Leadership” the employee would never have reached D2. However, a lot of times you might “inherit” teams with existing D2 employees present within. And it is your responsibility as their current Leader to work on them.

Again based on the levels at which he is in the two parameters, let us understand what confluence of Leadership he requires.

Since he is low on both parameters, he would require both High Directive & High Supportive Behaviors. i.e. Task oriented & Relationship oriented.

So you would continue to provide him with clear instructions on his tasks and roles and Monitoring & Feedback.

You would also need to ensure that you build a strong support system around him. 

Show that you care! Show that he is valued and an important part of the team. A good way of doing that is also involving other team members in enriching his experience.

This will also aid in enriching the other team members’ experience. We will talk about this more in detail as we move forward.

So the ideal confluence of behaviors for a Disillusioned Learner is –

High Directive High Supportive

This is also known as the “Coaching” style of leadership and should be maintained to improve his skill and will levels to attempt to gradually move him into D4 or Peak Performer.

The Danger here is that most employees at D2 level are unfortunately asked to move out of the organization (SACKED) or move away themselves. 

The loss to the existing Leader is the potential that goes away with them.

Penning down. Will be back soon with the “Reluctant Contributor”

CIAO!

The Enthusiastic Beginner - D1

 

D1 - THE ENTHUSIASTIC BEGINNER

We had a look at the Skill Will Matrix in the last article and understood the mapping of employees in their life cycle developmental levels based on their skill & will levels. We also listed the 4 categories of employees based on this.

Let’s understand the first one today – “The Enthusiastic Beginner”

This is an employee who has just begun his career or a new role in an organization.  Since he is new in his career or role, his skill levels are going to be considerably low.

**Please consider 'He, his' to be gender neutral terms for some time in these articles..

However, since it’s a new beginning for him, his motivation levels, energy and enthusiasm are going to be high.

So if you plot him on the matrix... this is where he would be.

This phase will last for a couple of months where he stays self-motivated and tries to learn skills he needs to, in order to do his role.

Now what we are going to talk about in this entire series is the natural progression of an employee if the right kind of leadership interventions or behaviors are not exhibited by the designated leader.

Ideally if you look at the levels at which he is in the two parameters, let us understand what confluence of Leadership he requires.

Since he is low on skill he would require High Task oriented behaviors or Directive behaviors.

Also, his will or motivation levels are already high. So he does not require high relationship oriented behaviors or Supportive behaviors.

A point to note, however, that it would not affect him negatively, if the supportive behaviors are marginally higher. The aspect to be taken into consideration, however, is that too much supportive behavior might lead him to complacency or might end up the leader being taken for granted or taken advantage of!

So the ideal confluence of behaviors for an Enthusiastic Beginner is –

High Directive Low Supportive

This is also known as the “Directing” style of leadership and should be maintained to improve his skill levels to attempt to gradually move him into D4 or Peak Performer without letting him slip into D2 or D3.

We will also focus on all 4 Leadership styles together once we complete detailed discussions on each developmental level in a separate article.

That’s it for now. Will come back soon with the “Disillusioned Learner”. Stay tuned!

Ciao!!